It's getting on for 3am and I've been awake now since 5.34am. I should by rights be snoring away in a deep sleep. I have after all spent the better part of 9 hours of the last 24 walking through a screaming hot London city, camera bag on my back shooting a full suite of branding images and video. Almost 18,000 foot steps, a half dozen tube journeys and a cable car ride. 4 coffee breaks and a can of diet coke were consumed.
Today's shoot was a little different to normal. The challenge I'd been set was to shoot entirely on mobile phones. I did take a 'big camera' with me and only used it in the final set of images as a justification of shlapping it all the way around time on a sweaty back.
And so now I lie here in the small hours staring at the ceiling. I'm playing the day through my head over and over. Even worse I can open my camera roll and flick through images, no waiting to upload.
Immediately after a shoot I'm second guessing myself. I'm asking questions, doubting choices made. What went well? What didn't. Oh crap that idea, completely forgot it. Will any of these even look good?
Wondering if I got IT.
You know IT. The million dollar picture. The one that takes your breath away, stops you in your tracks, illicits the grin, the biggest widest grin because well I'm the one who made it.
Except, as a photographer of people I'm not the only one involved. What will they think? How are they feeling? Did they even enjoy themselves?
The paranoia of the over stimulated mind is hard to quieten, calm or close down. Singing it's song in your ears for hours and hours. Even after time had passed its still there. It turns from the shoot to the edit.
Which ones will be best, how will they be cropped. What post process choices will be selected. High contrast, soft tones, cinematic portrayals. Black and White, maybe a tint.
Then there's all of the video? With almost 100 clips what are those edits, the highlights, the reels.
The over stimulated mind is always churning, turning and burning. Now it's almost 3.30 and soon it will be light out. The start of another day and a few more questions about the last 24hrs will make their voices heard.